JESUS worked it out!

Hi. I know I have been MIA but well, I've been going through it. And well, one storm is over and I am extremely happy about it; thrilled actually. Here is the story of how being steadfast in the Lord, keeping my eyes on Him and praying faithfully, changed my situation and strengthened my faith.

My job situation was NEVER what I thought it was going to be, so one month into my new job, I began looking for work(June). So I kept working there and praying. Working and praying. Well, things got really bad, but I never lost sight and my faith was stronger than ever. (I know I have a way to go, but this is the strongest I've ever been in my life)

So, basically, I had to quit my job. I did this last Wednesday. I had taken off work on Monday because I just couldn't take it anymore to look for jobs. I went to work Tuesday and set up a meeting with my company on Wenesday to address my concerns. I told them my concerns, they didn't care, nothing was solved, I quit; I had to.

I left the office and went directly to Kinkos and made copies of my resume and went to temp agencies. Went home and made more phone calls and sent out more resumes and applied for more jobs. Thursday, I go to the Washington Post job fair. Talk to some people, pass out my resume etc etc. I forgot to mention my church. My church and the message I receive from it weekly, is simply amazing. Revival was so good that Monday.

So, I wake up Friday morning to a phone call from a contact I had in the past. They needed to fill a position immediately. I sent her an updated copy of my resume, she sent it over and I got the job. Praise Jesus! While it is only temporary, it.is.a.job!

I couldn't be happier! Seriously. I never once worried about my situation, ever. I continued to pray and lean on the Lord. He will always provide for His children. I never worried about paying my bills, or putting gas in my truck or getting groceries; why, because it's already done and Jesus worked it out and continues to work it out.

My God is an Awesome God! I had to share with you all. We are always going to have storms in our lives, but it is how you choose to deal with and take those storms head on; by prayer and faith. That is it.

The Lord blesses us so much that His blessings overflow! He blesses us in such a way that others will see just how blessed we are. I had to share! The Lord is the best thing in my life. He is the only constant, unchanging force in my life. With that, I can sleep at night, peacefully.

Thanks for listening.

*B*

My fantabulous weekend!

Good morning all and happy Monday! I am on the serious countdown to Cancun! 9 days people, 9 days!!! Anywho, I hope each and every one of you had a fantastic weekend! b/c I sure did! I will break it down by day...

Thursday night:

Got to hang out and chill with my people from AOL that I miss dearly! It was like college all over again! There was a keg of Miller Lite(mother's milk, LOL), beer pong, flip cup and one of those tables with the soccer players but it's not called soccer? Oh, and JELLO SHOTS! yay! all of this on a Thursday; gotta love it! That is me, my girl Nik, and my homey Kirsten! Love it!




Friday:

Was a day from hell, but the night surely made up for it! We were supposed to go to Jazz in the sculpture gardens here in DC but the weather was not being nice! We decided to go home, nap, get refreshed and go out that night instead. Our plan was to go to this spot that is free all night and open bar till 11, then hit up Adam's Morgan since it was such a nice night out. We finally get into the spot, only to have about 20 minutes of free drinks...we made our way to the bar and double fisted to get the full benefits of the open bar, LOL! anyways, the men in there were um, not cute, but whatever we danced and danced and danced all night! Took it to Adam's Morgan to get some much needed food at the Diner and met some really cute and smart boys!


Saturday:

I went to my family reunion and now that I'm a vegetarian, found myself quite hungry seeing as though all they had cooked up were hot dogs and hamburgers until the real food was served. I survived off of fresh picked peaches and some chips. My family threw down on the seafood! Soft shell crabs, whiting, shrimp! I was in heaven!!! You know I took a full plate home with me haha!

That night was this party that is thrown monthly at a very nice and swanky location. Catering to the professional and grad school crowd, only 23 and up, we knew this would be a nice night. Indeed it was! The line was orderly and moved quickly, check. Every girl was dressed up in dresses or skirts, check. The men, the men, the men haha they were all dressed very dapper as well, gotta love it! There were no white tees, timbs or jeans in sight, this was definitely a good night! The place was packed, yet not all gross and sweaty like a club. No disrespectful men grabbing and pulling; just gently placing their hand on your waist if they wanted to dance. Such a nice affair it was. Good music, good drinks, fabulous people! What more could we have asked for!

This weekend was exactly what I needed! I thoroughly enjoyed myself and am looking forward to August 18th which is the next event they will have. If you are in the DC area, holla at me because this is an event you shouldn't miss ;-)

I hope you all have wonderful work days this week! Pray for me ya'll, there is stuff going on at my job and only the Lord can fix it! I know He will! :o)

*besos*

Kid for a day!

Today, I was a kid! :-) I didn't feel well all weekend and my mom could hear it in my voice so she told me to go over to her house yesterday and hang out; so I did. I went over and laid around in her fluffy couch and fuzzy blanket watching regular cable television and didn't care!

When she and my 9 year old brother got home from the baseball game, we watched the Discovery channel, Man vs. Wild, giggled and cringed together. (Seriously, if you haven't watched this, you should see a couple episodes; just do it!)

My little brother and I stayed up till like 1 watching Disney channel re-runs and the like. Ofcourse though, we overslept and didn't make it to church, shame, shame! But I did make a huge breakfast for the little tyke. He gobbled it up and ran outside at 10 o'clock on the dot and began ringing doorbells. Ah, remember those days!

Anyways, After my mom got back from singing in the choir, I went home and got ready for the day. She was going to make Sunday dinner so she wanted me to come right back! I did a little cleaning then went back over to hang out. I sat on the deck, soaking up the rays, reading all of her InStyle's, Town & Country's and Essence mags. After I got bored with that, I ran around with the little kiddies at the park.

It was so peaceful despite their little shrieks here and there and the occasional tussle. Reason being, the tire swing. There it sat, separate from the rest of the play area, a lone tire swing set against a dense little forrest. My eyes lit up and I ran to the tire swing before any of the little rascals could get to it first! I sat and twirled and kicked and pumped for about an hour lol! It was SO MUCH FUN!!!! The slight breeze on my face, sun coming through the trees...ah nothing in the world mattered while I was on my tire swing.

Then it was time to go in. I rounded up the kiddies and we ran/rode/skated back to our houses. I'm telling you, best day everrrrrrrrrrrrrr(If you watch SpongeBob, you know the tune!)

So now I sit in my very grown up condo-for-rent, watching Devil Wears Prada for the upteenth time on HBO preparing and thinking about the week ahead. I'm also successfully ignoring a very insane certain someone who breezes in and out of twon thinking I am to adheer/adjust to his schedule, psssshhhhhhht!

I hope you all have a FANTABULOUS week! And if you get the chance, go and be a kid!

*B*, over and out!

P.S. - aren't these the cutest little girls on their tire swings!

Block

Writer's.
Thought Process.
Life.
Emotion. - sadness, hatred, disappointment, lonely, tired, confused, depressed.

Closing my eyes until tomorrow.

Second Chances

None of you know, right now, just how happy I really am! I am ecstatic!!! I just wrote this post last night about effing up a relationship and woke up this morning to an email that made me smile...oh and tear up a bit. Remember how I said to say all the mushy stuff and express your feelings no matter what, well I did just that after my ridiculous argument/fight I caused on Saturday between me and him. He wrote me back saying he still wants to see me and work it out :o) *swoon*

I better not mess this up, for real. I mean I really kirked out on him on Saturday, like to the extreme. This totally says a lot about him as a person and definitely makes me want to straighten up, LOL! I am looking forward to what our relationship can become. I hope our friendship and bond strengthens everyday so we can be the people we both want for ourselves.

I seriously did not think that this would work out in my favor, but the fact that he is willing to give me another chance is so wonderful. Guess I will keep you all posted!

Over and out,

*B*

I've done it again!

Yup, Bianca has YET a-DAMN-gain ruined a perfectly good, healthy, loving, nurturing, ADULT, could-see-the-future-together WONDERFUL relationship; P.S. that is the second one in three, yes 3 months! WTF!!!

What is wrong with me!? Seriously, clearly, it is me. And that makes me so sad. Why is this happening you ask? Well, I will tell you...

...I trip and flip out over trivial, petty shyt. Yes, that is my fault. I'm talking shyt can be SO sweet, going so so well. Then, something will set me off, and that.is.it.

I truly am upset right now. This guy was something so special. He had a light about him that attracted him to me so much more. He is so determined to make something of himself, all I want to do is help him along the way. We grew so close over the last month, it was like magic. But alas, abracadaba, shyt is over, all because of me. And no, this will not get a second chance. That bridge is basically non existant, blown up never to be rebuilt.

I'm sad. It didn't hit me until this morning and my bed was empty because we had a fight last night. I'm sullen. I will get over it.

*B*

I listened, for once

Was talking to one of my boys about how much I can't stand that damn NeYo song, Do You. He just laughed because he knew why I couldn't stand to hear it or think about the words in the song. SO he gave me some unsolicited advice, he told me I should speak to the person with whom the song reminds me. I then laughed because I thought that was the DUMBEST thing EVER!

Well, just so happens I couldn't stop thinking about doing just that. I didn't know what the f I was going to say but I needed to speak with this person. I did. And I'm glad I did. Quite a few things were resolved and I feel a bit more at peace with my decision.

Anyways, I also think life is just too short, as evidenced by my friend's father's untimely and horribly surprising death on Sunday. Your time and days are not yours. Don't leave things unsaid. Say I love you to your family and friends every chance you get. Spend time with your grandmother or grandfather if you are so lucky to have them still in your life - I make it a point to go visit my grandmother every chance I get because I do not know what I would do without her.

Even if you think someone doesn't want to hear from you or you can't fathom saying mushy things (lol, that's so me) say them anyways! They will so appreciate it.

That's all, *B*

just blogging

What up world! I felt like I needed to blog and get stuff off my chest, but it's difficult to write it all out. I guess some things you don't want to see in black and white. It's nothing bad or serious, but normally when I blog, it's free flowing and easy. Today, I have started and stopped blogging like three times. hmmm, I don't get it. There isn't anything overly major goings on in my lil ol life. I have a few annoyances, but I just have to take care of them and get rid of them once and for all. Um, I definitely can't wait till I get my new purse! and I really like that Mario song "How can I breathe" or something; it's cute and I like the beat. Gossip sites are ultra boring lately being over consumed by the idiot trifecta a.k.a. - LiLo, Jail bird, Skeletor etc... I wonder what would happen if these simpletons just didn't come out of their house, then I guess people would be obsessed and wonder why they weren't and so on and so forth; lost cause.

Do you ever wake up and feel like, "damn! it's time for me to make my mark in this crazy world!" "It's my time to truly shine." I do, like all the time. I better do something about it, and fast. I'm only getting older, blah haha! I always try to think about and figure out what I would be truly happy doing? I mean right now, besides making that paper, I can't see past that. I mean with major paper, comes a shitty job; in my opinion. I would love to just do something I truly loved in addition to making stacks. I want to be able to do what I want to do when I want to do it. I am sick of being stuck doing, mundane work for peanuts. I even considered being a teacher, LOL, because they get summers off, but then, there is that money thing; there isn't any. AND, I don't too much like children, so, that's out.

I want to pick up and move somewhere else, I'm over this area. It's fun, I guess, but I've had my fun and now I want to go somewhere else. But, in order to move somewhere you have to have a job, a place and a reason lined up, BLAH! I'm sure if I just seriously sat down and wrote out a plan and set goals for each step, I will accomplish what I want to do, but again, that whole job thing gets in the way. I hate working. HATE it! But, oh well, what am I going to do about it - nothing, just work and shut up about it.

So my bootcamp class rocks! I totally love it! I go three times a week and run on the days I don't have it and I couldn't be happier! I am back to working out and getting fit. Only problem, is I have an injury and if I don't do something about it soon, I could seriously injure myself and that I can not do. It just really, really sucks! I just started to really enjoy this and bam! now I'm injured! Truth be told, I just don't want to go to the doctor and they tell me I can't work out or I have to stay off my foot or "take it easy." Man bump that! I am just going to get new kicks and ice the hell out of my injury everyday. I'm a soldier lol.

Anywho, thats' about it from the desktop of *B* Have a fantabulous day people and I will be back momentarily.

*B* over and out!

It's been a long time...

...Since I left you with a dope blog to read! SO here goes! Where to begin! Well let's start with Wednesday when me and my CB 'broke up' due to him becoming emotionally INSANE! I don't need him on the phone telling me how he's mad I only call him when I'm drunk and...anywho, blah! It's been our 'arrangement' for 3 damn years and you wanna catch feelins now? um, next!

BTW last week was the last week at my job with AOL *sad face* I'm going to miss those people!!! So Thursday was my going away happy hour...a Happy time it was! And a drunk time...playing beer pong and flip cup till the wee hours of the morning! lol so fun! But um, let's bring it to Friday morning, my last day, and my ass was SICK! So much alcohol in my system and so little time to get done what I needed to get done before I left AOL for good! Not a good combo, BUT I pulled it off! woo hoo! But I still wasn't quite right, lol, for the rest of the day. On to my girl's wedding rehearsal...

So after being hungover for the majority of my day, (hell the whole day), I headed over to Landsdowne resort for Tiffanys wedding rehearsal. Being the diva I am, I showed up fashionably late; not a good look, B. So we run through the processional and we get a break! I think wonderful, I can go home and sleep. Not so. By the time I get home, get a stern talking to from my mother (for being a brat), washed my face and put on some make-up, it was time to go to the rehearsal dinner! Now, a heavy, authentic Italian meal the day before getting into a satin, floor-length gown...LOL but it all worked out! To the wedding...

The day was BEAUTIFUL! I'm not talking about the weather, because it had us all nervous, but the WHOLE day! From all of us running around getting ready in the Bridal suite; hair, drinks, make-up, drinks, pictures, drinks, snacks, drinks...you get the picture, we were all on edge! We just wanted Tiffany's day to go off without a hitch! And it did! it was a WONDEFUL, BEAUTIFUL day! Oh how I loved her wedding! It's so nice to be around people who are truly, madly, deeply in love with each other! It may have revived my whole thoughts, ponderings, musings about love and marriage...hmmm

So tonight, I am mentally, physically and spiritually preparing for my new job tomorrow in the Recruiting field! I am very excited about this new opportunity that God has blessed me with! I am looking forward to a change of pace and gettin my career thing on. Alright ladies and gentelmen, I'm out! I gotta watch the rest of this Charm School mess! So...

That's all.
*B*